by @HelenaSmrcek

Here comes a confession. I grew up hating reading. Ironic as it may sound, coming from an author,  I had a good reason for it.

Although never formally diagnosed, I had a mild form of dyslexia. Bs and Ds were a guessing game for me; Ss and question marks always seemed to turn the wrong way. Left and right still confuse me at times.

In addition, we had to read out loud in front of the entire class. Our teacher would select a text and we would go around the classroom reading a sentence each. The terror of that exercise is difficult to describe. I would count how many of my classmates were in front of me and then figure out which would be my sentence. That would be the only thing I focused on, reading it repeatedly until my turn. At times, I miscounted. Later, to my horror, our teacher changed tactics. Each student was to read until she said stop. There was no strategy for that.

Join us today on My Reading Life while author Helena Smrcek tells us all about her reading life #reading #readingcommunity Share on X

This is how I developed a strong dislike for reading. Our mandatory journals summarizing the assigned books became a prized commodity. I copied my friends’ entries, hoping none of my teachers would catch on.

This went on till grade seven. And then I found a copy of Alexander Dumas’ The Three Musketeers in my parents’ library. The paperback went with me everywhere, and I stole every minute I could. I immersed myself in the splendor of the French court, with its complex intrigues and brave musketeers saving the queen from an utter disaster. My mind created vivid images as I followed the story one line at a time. For the first time, I experience the sorrow of reading the last page. And then I discovered there was a sequel.

When I entered the publishing world—well, let me back up a little here. I must mention that our family immigrated to Canada the year I turned 18. Although we carried some Czech literature in our suitcases, the world we embraced spoke English. At times, I felt utterly lost, like that little kid in third grade. However, with enough help from my ESL teachers and eagerness to assimilate into our new culture, English became my primary language.

Now, let’s get back to the world of Christian publishing. I’m sure you have heard the phrase: God has a sense of humor. Well, how about a kid raised in a communist society that denounced the existence of God. Never mind the undiagnosed learning disability. The next chapter? American missionaries in an Austrian refugee camp brought the Good News to a depressed teenager. Then, almost two years later, a flight to Canada. Yet another culture shock, homesickness, and rejection. High school wasn’t easy for anyone. Especially if you didn’t speak the language and wore the wrong clothes every day.

Yet, by His grace, God somehow decided that I would write books. Not only did He give me stories to tell, but they are stories of faith.

Here is the second part of my confession. Most of my friends write. To this day, I consider myself a slow reader. I also love having my finger in several pies simultaneously, so sitting down and reading just doesn’t work. I felt so inadequate and even disloyal for not reading my friends’ work. I struggled for years, wondering how to solve this dilemma. And then I discovered audiobooks.

Friends, this was another life-changing experience. I probably read over fifty books a year. I really don’t count. I love sweet romance, mystery, romantic suspense, thrillers, even horror. Give me a historical or sci-fi. I love them all. Sometimes, I fall behind on my deadline because I can’t turn off the narrator. The world of stories is such an amazing gift from God.

And isn’t it typical of our Lord to choose the most unlikely vessel to deliver his message? To this day, I bring healthy laughter to my editors as they discover my special words, typos, and strange sentences—to that, I say: Sorry, my ESL is showing.

To fully embrace your abilities, as well as your disabilities, is a gift of God. I realized that God made me this way, knowing that some of my shortcomings would be a life-long struggle. But they might also serve as an encouragement to others walking along a similar path. For in our weaknesses, He is strong.

 It no longer stings when someone points out an error; I would have been petrified only a few years ago. It doesn’t mean that I stopped striving to get better, to improve my craft, and to write great stories. It only means that I no longer feel ashamed of my weaknesses. For God knew them, yet still called me. The glory goes to Him, always.

How about you? What’s your story? What are you wrestling with, and what is trying to stop you from reaching your God-given destiny. And as you contemplate these questions, remember: He loves you. God created you in His image, and you are His masterpiece, no matter if you feel like one today.

 

Helena Smrcek is an award-winning author and screenwriter who believes in the power of a well-told story. Her readers can expect a captivating page-turner filled with thrilling suspense and heartwarming romance. When not at her keyboard, Helena loves listening to audiobooks, working on her hobby farm, and traveling. She lives in Southern Ontario with her husband, three Vizslas, several cats, a herd of goats, and an undisclosed number of chickens.